我怎么了？

（零）
最近心情起伏非常大
高兴可以很高兴
眼泪都飙出来了.....
伤心可以哭到很惨
心好痛...眼泪哗啦哗啦地从眼睛出来....
而且心境也体验到很大的差别

（一）
Biz Law商法
这科让我体验了什么叫
从伤心极点到高兴极点......
从F等级到D等级再到C及格
这个过程就好像
从地狱去到人间
人间去到天堂那般
这个真的真的让我体验很多
我知道 我真的是个有点傻的家伙
大家都认为不可能的事 我越想去做 结果我成功了
这个事后 也了解谁是我的真正朋友  谁只是我的生命的过客
过客们  我一定会冷淡你们的 请将我忘记 我会慢慢遗忘你们
一旦我完成  然后离开现在的位置

（二）
参加了人生中的第4个学记培训营
这次的培训营很多的老学记都没去
连同届的也很少 所以就去了三天而且还当天来回

每一年都很害怕去到培训营会很无聊 没人聊天
结果年年去那 每一年都有很多可以聊
也许学记的朋友 很少见 所以可以很多话聊
这个学记大家庭还是一样的温馨
学记队的朋友 我绝对不会忘掉 因为你们是我的家人

此外，每一年去小学记的培训营都会参加演出 今年也不例外
2008年泰国首相颂猜   2009年普缇   2010年梁静茹
一年只演一个  不过有时演伤者 暴动者
这个三个都是完全不同世界的人  只是颂猜和普缇是泰国人
今年演的梁静茹 让我感觉什么叫等待 朦胧画面 和很多一大堆你的粉丝
还有体验到从多人陪你而随  然后单独去厕所换衣服的 很大差别


（三）
我发现自己对某个人太好了  超出我应该要对那人好的范围
因为我不懂自己为什么 对那个人那样的好 也许看到自己的影子
我是天蝎座的人 所以我有点天蝎座的原则
我对谁好 得不回那人对我好 我无所谓
但是使我伤心和痛心 忽略我
我会觉得我自己是个白痴 有时觉得我是不是头脑坏掉了
也许是我真的太笨了 我应该清醒
不要什么事都为那个人着想 不要什么事都和那个人说
从始至终那人我并不了解  当然那人也不会了解我
因这个世界没人会了解我  因为我自己也不了解自己
那人只是我的普通朋友  普通朋友  普通朋友
为什么我要超出我对普通朋友好的范围 这个差别很大

（四）
在不同的位置 不同的地方时 我发现别人给我的评语有很大的差别
在某一个地方 和 位置 很多人都说我口才很好 很厉害和人沟通和交往
不过在某一些地方 和 位置 很多人说我非常的静 和别人沟通和交往很差劲
这个是一个很大的差别 我不知道为什么 自己 会这样
这是物以类聚的关系 还是自己懒得和过客参太多

头脑一直浮现奇怪的差别 也许我读法律 读到这样了  -  -

（五）
我接触了路西法效应----也看到菲利普。津巴多先生的演讲视频
在其中我知道了人变坏的原因
其实人人都可以成为别人眼中的坏人   一旦某些因素符合就可以构成
在这个花花世界 我想我也曾成为过别人眼中的坏人

在路西法效应形成之前津巴多先生 找了大学生体验监狱的生活
一些学生是警卫 一些学生是犯人  刚开始时大家都嘻嘻哈哈的
不过之后 大家都以为自己真的是警卫和犯人了
演警卫的学生会不断使用权利去惩罚和侮辱演犯人的人
而演犯人的人只会不断你涌出反抗的情绪去对抗演警卫的人 甚至演犯人的人真实崩溃
他们好像完全忘记自己其实只在实验
这是个很大的差别 他们是一批良好的学生 但是为什么在监狱里 可以变成那样？

我

嗯
我已经20岁了
是应该改变了
我不是为谁改变
我是为自己而改变

我知道我的兴趣
我喜欢创作
其次是创新物品，哲理，音乐，生意，电子，大自然以及摄影。

20年的岁月，许多的环境与人为影响造成现在的我。

我发现我很特别，我一直怀疑自己是外星人：

一个头发散乱的女子
还很自豪地跟其他人说：我的头发乱，你们才能在老远的地方看到我。

一个衣着不怎么时尚且孩子气的女子
还很自豪地说：我就是懒惰去买衣服，衣服是给人穿来保暖的，我宁愿省下钱去吃好料。

一个拖鞋穿到窜洞了也不换的女子
 还很自豪地说：鞋子只是给人类避免踩到危险物而有的东西，既然我穿这鞋，没危险，这样你管我鞋子是否烂了。

一个往往被人误认为小学生的女子
还很自豪地说：我就是年轻，厉害保养。

一个背着自己书包不放下的女子
还很自豪地说：我已经习惯了，我在训练我背重物的能力。

一个总把头发梳去一边露出额头的女子
还很自豪地说：我不怎么梳，我会很容易吸引男人的，万一我应付不了他们怎么办？

一个看着想买的东西不走的女子
还很自豪地说：我不能走开，我要让喜欢我的人看到我喜欢这个东西。

一个还没学驾车的女子
还很自豪地说：我不用学车的，因为我的未来是有司机载我。

一个常常拒绝朋友出去玩的女子
还很自豪地说：我家不富有对我来说这些钱不应该花在这些地方，对我来说太奢侈太浪费，这些钱应该花在其他更有意义的地方。

一个对回忆放不下的女子
还很自豪地说：我的记忆能力很好。

一个被老师当众侮辱指责的女子
还很自豪地说：老师在磨练我，我要做到更好给他知道，我并没有像他想象的那样。

一个头发总是短发的女子
还很自豪地说：短发很适合我，长发太浪费我的时间了也很麻烦。

一个生日不收礼物的女子
还很自豪地说：你们就帮我省下这些钱吧！捐给老人院或孤儿院，然后把收据给我。如果你们要送就送我I PHONE，车子，房子，其余的就不用了。

一个   一个    一个 ......

一个喜欢独自去旅行的女子
一个经常独自到处游走在校园的女子

一个喜欢安静环境的女子
一个嘴巴不能停止说话的女子

一个喜欢纯音乐的女子
一个经常写歌词的女子

一个喜欢研究哲学的女子
一个不喜欢有规律的女子

一个不断创新的女子
一个喜欢回忆过去的女子

......

我到底是怎样的人，
我也不清楚，
有时候我发觉自己不了解自己，
我想这个世界上也没有其他人会了解我，
一个也没有，
以为很了解我的人，就未免也太自大了。

我想改变，我想改变，我要成为我要成为的人，
那个人是我，谁也不能代替，我也不是谁的代替品！

20岁了，对吧？

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FyyelT6hYkA

119...119...要要救
是中国的全国消防日
嘻嘻....
也是我的生日....
我成功渡过了19岁了

上帝和各位神明
我成功了
一关一关勇敢地闯着
不畏惧
虽然眼泪还是会流
虽然心里还是会痛
但是19岁后的我
我想我会比19岁之前的我更加的坚强

我知道 我知道 这一切都会变得比之前更好
我会活得更好
更坚强
更有本事
更有能力
去应付未来
更精彩
更幸福
的美好日子

19岁的那些不堪回首的日子
是我之前的一切负面思想所造就的
之后的日子会
更好
更棒
因为正面的思想的一切
已经来到我的生命中
我会活得更好，更幸福

感谢陷害我，歧视我，轻视我的人，
没有你们，
我就不会体验到什么是人间
最残酷也最有效的礼物
一切都会变好，成为祝福

感谢帮助我，安慰我，鼓励我的人，
没有你们，
我就不会在这里了，你们让我体验到人间
最美好最温暖的礼物
一切的一切，是多麽地让我感激在心底
我永生也不敢忘记，
我一定要能够完成我的梦想，
我要回报给你们！

My Dream

Gnomic “If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” By Henry David Thoreau.

     I  believe  everyone has dreams. Whether they be to become a scientist and discover new and amazing things, or become a star basketball player and be the highest paid player in the league .Furthermore, Some people want to be rich, dreaming of becoming millionaires overnight. Others want to be famous, dreaming of suddenly jumping to great fame .People dream about their future. I have dreams for the future just like everyone else.  And I will do whatever it takes to achieve it. College is my first step to achieve my dream.

     Recovered memory, i remember when I was a young  girl, on my every  birthday, if have people  asked me,“What  are your dream ?”I answered proudly,“I want to be a female enterpriser and then i can uses many money to help that people and develop community !”On hearing this, Some people was very surprise and said to me, "You are so brave, I hope you can achieve your great dream. " But also some people will ridicule my dream is impossible occur in my life . However, i insist on my believe that dream will become true. 

        However, I knew very well that I could not succeed without  painstaking efforts. So I studied hard in the high school and college in order to attain my goal.

     

   After graduating from high school , I study at Southern College. Although I was very busy with  school work, I never gave up my dream. I read a lot of business books to get more  commercial  knowledge. I made experiments to practise and apply what I had learnt from the books. Sometimes, I was so deeply indulged in my research that I forgot my meals and time.

      
    To attain my goal, I  also must make a point of training my body and mind. This is a highly competitive society in which everyone is eager to come out on top. That is not only a competition of physical strength and mental power, but a marathon of patience, faith, and perseverance. Life is not all roses, but with what I am being equipped with by the good teachers in this elite school, I surely deserve a promising prospect. I am very happy.The ladder of becoming a enterpriser is  still far ahead, but I have climbed the first rung  anyway.

By Jeffeny 

Six steps to find purpose in life

Most of us live our life unconsciously. The daily routine of work keeps our mind busy. There is always the next vacation or party to look forward to. Then one Sunday afternoon, when we are lolling in our bed, it suddenly hits us? What is my purpose in life? For some this question arises when they are stuck in a meaningless job or a dead end life situation。

Living life with an external purpose can be quite satisfying but it's not so straight forward to come up a fixed purpose by which you define your life. Most people come up with a purpose just for the heck of it and then they find out that they are not really passionate about it in the first place。

It helps to have a solid foundation in reality, or the truths of life, before you sit down to finding your purpose in life. Here are a few pointers that can help you in this process。

Check if you already have a purpose

If you find your present life purposeless just look again. In the totality of life there is no purpose that is too small or too big. Even a street sweeper fulfills a very important purpose in his life. Even if you are working in a small firm you are fulfilling a vital purpose in the link of life by the service you provide。

May be you are supporting a family, or raising kids, that's quite a significant purpose. If you think your life is meaningless right now, it would just show that you are not really paying attention to your present role。

Your true calling need not be magnanimous

Some people get really famous while some live a private life. There is no real difference between the two. Each person fulfills a specific role and no role is more important than the other。

Your inherent talent might just define your life's purpose? It's surprising how many people go through life with some incredible talent within which they don't convert to a career or service. If you have a talent, it's life's gift to you. Try to find the best way possible to convert your talent to something which gives service to people. There is no better way to live a purpose, and make money, than through an inherent talent。

Listen to your heart rather than your mind

Heart and mind are just metaphors. Heart denotes your intuition while the mind stems out of your conditioning patterns. Get in touch with the inner voice in your heart and see if there is a deep seated desire that is recurring. May be all along you have just ignored this desire。

Your mind might find several excuses to tell you what your heart wants is impractical, but that's just your conditioning speaking. The voice of your heart is always true and it points to your deep seated yearning。

Write up an essay on what type of life you want to live

It's amazing how many insights you can get simply by writing down your thoughts. There are millions of thoughts rushing through the mind each day and it's difficult to make sense of it all. When you sit down to write, the thoughts become more organized。

Without much ado just start typing or writing down what type of life you really want to live. Just write freely without involving the mind too much, let the words just come out of your subconscious. You might have to write for a few minutes before you really get into the groove。

It helps to write for a few hours even if your mind stops churning out ideas. It's precisely when the mind gives up that the heart starts talking. When you read this essay you can find your purpose in life in some of the words or sentences that came out subconsciously。

Let the answer come from stillness

Our intelligence operates at two levels? One is the noisy mind and the next is the silent space of stillness within us. The space of stillness is far more intelligent than the conditioned mind and this has been proven by several creative geniuses who speak of entering the zone of no-mind before creating their master pieces。

To access this space of stillness, just sit in a relaxed position and get in touch with your inner body. When you place you attention on your inside of your body, the mind tends to stop. Feel the sensations and energy passing through your body. After a while all these sensations will subside and will give way to stillness. Ask for your purpose in this state of stillness without expecting a verbal answer from your mind。

Sometimes you might get your answer immediately as a sudden burst of intuition or you might get your answer later in your dreams or waking state。

Follow up on your intuition

Whenever you get an intuitive hit to do something just follow up on it. Sometimes it's important to take a few risks to find the true purpose in your life. Just make sure you are in tune with your intuition while making these decisions. In the end there is no such thing as a failure, it's just an opportunity to learn。

It might take a few failed attempts and dead ends before you finally hit upon the true purpose of your life. You are likely to make fewer mistakes if you are in touch with your inner voice of intuition. Always remember that the emotion you feel in your body is the true indicator of what you really feel about your decisions rather than the thoughts in your mind。

One person one sentence

R  Have an aim in life, or your energies will be wasted.

沒有目標的一生註定庸庸碌碌，確定一個目標吧。----- R.Peters

R  Living without an aim is like sailing without a compass.

生活沒有目標，就像航海中沒有羅盤。---- John Ruskin

R  One of the most dangerous forms of human error is forgetting what one is trying to achieve.

人犯錯誤最危險的一種就是忘記自己的目標是什麼。---- Paul Nitze

R  High expectations are the key to everything.

遠大的理想是開啟萬物的鑰匙。

R  What makes life dreary is the want of motive.

缺少動力將讓生活無聊乏味。----- G.Eliot

R  If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.

如果你只是等待，發生的只是你變老了。---- Larry McMurtry

R  Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.

不要試圖去做個成功者，寧可做個有價值的人。---- Einstein

R  Hope deserts us at no period of our existence.

在我們一生中，希望從來未遺棄過我們。---- R.L.Stevenson

R  Hope is a good breakfast, but it is a bad supper.

希望是頓美好的早餐，但卻是頓糟糕的晚餐。(立志要趁早，別拖延)---- Francis Bacon

R  It is not by the grey of the hair that one knows the age of the heart.

白髮並不能告訴你一個人心靈的年紀。---- Edward B.Lytton

R  If you do not plant knowledge when young, it will give us no shade when we are old.

如果年輕時不培養知識，年老時將沒有乘涼的樹蔭。---- Chesterfield

R  Progress is the activity of today and the assurance of tomorrow.

進步乃今日之努力，明日之保證。---- Emerson

我知道

我知道 我知道

 一切彩虹出现在雨后

虽然日子难过还是照过

不受伤害怎么会知道痛 

有时候 有时候 

对着自己傻笑很可笑

虽然潜意识明明很难过

不想流泪对镜子说加油

当日子 慢慢过 

手上的表不停来回转

身边的人还是庸庸碌碌

东奔西跑灵魂像似丧尸

看着他们我看见了自己

我知道 我知道

我累了  我累了

他的背影

远望着他 不敢眨眼
我知道在我眼前有他  是多麽让我觉得幸福的事 
我懦弱 我不敢呼唤他的名字 
我知道 我不想知道
我怕他知道我的情感 
我不想知道 他知道不知道我对他的情感
我希望有一天 我看到他的侧影 只因能和他同行
那天 我将遗忘他的背影 让我心作痛的伤口